Conversation Etiquette

Guidelines for Edifying Conversation:

• Don’t be afraid to remain quiet. Most mistakes are made when we talk too much, not too little. Proverbs 10:19 (NKJV) – “In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is wise.”

• Be quick to hear. Be a good listener. Proverbs 29:20 (NKJV) – “Do you see a man hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him.”

• Be attentive. Ask questions of the person to whom you are speaking, to get them to talk.

• Think before you speak.

• Ask advice of someone who knows more about a subject than you do.

• Whenever possible, ask a question after giving someone a compliment, so the receiver has something to say. For example: If you compliment someone about a job they did, ask them how they did it.

• The appropriate way to respond to a compliment is simply by saying, “Thank you.”

• In conversation, the guideline your mother taught you is true:
   “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
    Proverbs 15:4 (Message) – “Kind words heal and help; cutting words wound and maim.”
    Proverbs 16:24 (NLT) – “Kind words are like honey – sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.”

• In offering your opinion, preface it by saying, “It seems to me..."

• Stay out of a discussion if you think you may become too intense. Remain in it if you can respectfully voice your opinion and listen to others as they speak.

• Be tactful and discreet. For example, don’t ask people why they are disabled, why they do not look well, if they had plastic surgery, or anything else that may be a personal matter.

• Do not interrupt someone, unless it is an emergency. James 1:19 (NLT) – “My dear brothers and sisters, be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to get angry.”

• Don’t gossip. Leviticus 19:16 (NLT) – “Do not spread slanderous gossip among your people. Do not try to get ahead at the cost of your neighbor’s life, for I am the Lord.”

• Do not correct someone when they pronounce a word wrong or make a grammatical error.

• Do not betray a confidence or reveal secrets. Proverbs 11:13 (NLT) – “A gossip goes around revealing secrets, but those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence.”